Week 8 Cheat Sheet: How not to get fired Detroit Lions News at Lionsportal.com

In the worlds of professional baseball, basketball and hockey, it's not all that rare to see a head coach fired mid-season. But in football? Well, you just don't see it occur as often. Owners and general managers tend to wait until at least the Monday after the season finale to hand out their pink slips.

That was, of course, until this year. We're seven weeks into the 2008 NFL season and we've already seen three NFL coaches fired. Mike Nolan, axed by 49ers brass on Monday, joins Lane Kiffin in Oakland and Scott Linehan in St. Louis on the dubious list of coaches shown the exit door before the final curtain.

What can other NFL coaches learn from this? Here are six things we've learned not to do:

1. Don't have a public soap opera with a franchise quarterback that you drafted: After a promising finish to the 2006 season, the 49ers suffered through a horrendous 5-11 campaign in '07. The nosedive was highlighted by an ongoing and ultimately public feud between Nolan, the team's third-year coach, and 2005 first overall pick Alex Smith. When Nolan and 49ers personnel chief Scott McCloughlan selected Smith, they envisioned a mobile, crafty gunslinger similar to the one they saw lead an undefeated Utah team to a Fiesta Bowl victory in 2004. What they got was inconsistency, a longer adjustment period than expected and, ultimately, public warfare with the head coach.

The relationship between Smith and Nolan deteriorated last year because of a complete lack of respect and communication. Though his shoulder was banged up and his play was suffering, the young quarterback publicly denied any injuries. Once Smith admitted to being injured, his coach came off as completely unsympathetic. In the end, Smith accused Nolan of undermining him in the locker room, too. Who was right or wrong makes no difference. Locker room beefs and coach-quarterback drama should never become public knowledge. It's just not good for business.

The real kicker? Smith, out for the year with yet another injury, is still employed by the Niners, while Nolan is not.

2. Don't have a horribly tenuous relationship with the man who signs your checks: There are apparently lawsuits yet to be filed and whatnot, so we don't know what really went on in Oakland over the past two years. But what we do know is this: Lane Kiffin didn't like Al Davis, and Al Davis didn't like Lane Kiffin. And that's a tremendous understatement. In his infamous press conference a few weeks ago, Davis used some pretty heavy words in explaining his reasoning behind firing Kiffin. Among them: "propaganda," "lying," "bringing disgrace to the organization," and the kicker: referring to the young coach as "a flat-out liar." This is not good. Not good at all.

Though it seemed as though Kiffin wanted out of Oakland as much as Davis wanted him out, the words "propaganda" and "flat-out liar" are not things a 31-year-old guy wants on his resume, regardless of his profession.

3. Don't coach a game like you're a man who knows he is coaching his last game: Both Linehan and Kiffin coached their final games with an obvious stench of desperation. Against the Bills in Week 4, the Rams ran three reverse plays and went for it on 4th-and-3 from the Buffalo 42 . . . in the first half! Linehan opted to start 38-year-old Trent Green over healthy perennial Pro Bowler Marc Bulger and released starting cornerback Fakhir Brown earlier in the week. That same Sunday against the Chargers, Lane Kiffin sent Sebastian Janikowski out to attempt a 76-yard field goal at the end of the first half. These are not the moves coaches with strong senses of job security make. Hell, these are not the moves a 10-year-old playing "Madden" makes.

Must-read:

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4. Don't have your star players suffer injuries . . . in practice: Linehan got a bit of a pass last year because the entire Rams roster seemed to be out with injuries. The team's starting quarterback, running back, left tackle and top defensive end all missed significant time with injuries in '07. On Dec. 10, when Rams president John Shaw held a press conference to confirm Linehan's job was safe, 11 Rams were on injured reserve. Crappy luck, huh? Well, not quite. Over the last few weeks of the season, Linehan grew increasingly tight-lipped regarding all of the various injuries. Red flags were raised.

According to a Dec. 22 AP story, "Practices are closed after the first half-hour, and Linehan confirmed only yesterday a published report that quarterback Marc Bulger's setback on a week he was scheduled to return from a concussion earlier this month was caused by him getting struck on the head by a football during practice. Linehan said he found out about the accident the next week, and the St. Louis Post-Dispatch disclosed the accident on Thursday." Yeah, so none of that is any good, either. None of it all.

5. Have a strong working relationship with your coordinators: Linehan, a former offensive coordinator with the Dolphins and Vikings, ultimately stripped play-calling duties from St. Louis coordinators Greg Olson and Al Saunders. Meanwhile, Lane Kiffin reportedly did not communicate whatsoever with his defensive coordinator, Rob Ryan. Who knows what kind of relationship Mike Martz and Mike Nolan had in San Francisco? Whatever it was, Frank Gore carried the ball 11 times for 11 yards on Sunday in New York. Something's very wrong with that stat.

6. Don't lose all the time: Let's face it: Linehan, Kiffin and Nolan were not Lombardi, Landry and Gibbs. Sugarcoat their tenures all you want, each guy was a colossal loser and in the end that's really what doomed them. In three years as coach of the Rams, Linehan went 11-25. Kiffin, for all his hype and support from the media, had a career 5-15 record with the Raiders. Nolan went 17-38. None coached a single playoff game. They didn't perform up to expectations and were fired.

To the head guys in Cincinnati, Kansas City, Detroit, Minnesota, Cleveland, and gulp, even Dallas and San Diego, I hope you're all taking notes. It's been a nutty year for NFL coaches, and you never know when your next loss will be your last.

Don't say you weren't warned.

The Week 8 Cheat Sheet

San Diego vs. New Orleans (London), 1 p.m. EST

The NFL did Europe wrong last season by forcing 90,000 fans to endure a downright hideous, 13-10 Giants win over the Dolphins in the mud. Let's hope the Chargers and Saints give our friends across the pond something a little more entertaining in Drew Brees' first start vs. his former team. For giving us "The Office," we owe them at least this much. The Pick: San Diego 33, New Orleans 24

Oakland at Baltimore, 1 p.m.

Tom Cable's Raiders were penalized an almost unheard of 14 times for 85 yards last Sunday, with nine of those infractions coming on offsides and false start calls. In other words, Oakland's back to playing Raiders football! Cable's guys (you like that?) will play tough on Sunday, but come up just short in Baltimore. The Pick: Baltimore 20, Oakland 16

Arizona at Carolina, 1 p.m.

Do you think Arizona's Matt Leinart and Carolina's Dwayne Jarrett -- USC's all-time leaders in passing and receiving touchdowns -- kinda give each other a shrug after Sunday's game and ask, "What the hell happened?" Neither will play any role whatsoever in Carolina's victory this weekend. But hey, Go Trojans. The Pick: Carolina 31, Arizona 21

Tampa Bay at Dallas, 1 p.m.

Remember when Marion Barber used to see the ball? Feels like forever ago. Look for Dallas to get back to basics, MB-III to get back into the game plan, and for the Cowboys to survive a "must win" over Tampa at home on Sunday. The Pick: Dallas 23, Tampa Bay 20 (OT)

Washington at Detroit, 1 p.m.

The Washington State Cougars are 0-5 in the Pac-10 and have given up 66, 63, 66 and 69 points in different conference games this season. And, yet, I'm thoroughly convinced they'd give the Lions a competitive ballgame. The Pick: Washington 21, Detroit 10

Buffalo at Miami, 1 p.m.

In fourth-quarter play this season, Buffalo quarterback Trent Edwards has completed 29 of 38 passes (76.3 percent) for 375 yards with 3 TDs vs. 0 INTs and a 133.1 passer rating. Look elsewhere if you're searching for someone who'll pick against him and his Bills. The Pick: Buffalo 30, Miami 14

St. Louis at New England, 1 p.m.

Is there a better name in football than BenJarvus Green-Ellis? Well, yes: O.J. Atogwe. Both will play significant roles on Sunday, where an inspired, Jim Haslett-led Rams squad wins its third straight and takes one from the banged-up Patriots in New England. The Pick: St. Louis 24, New England 17

Kansas City at the New York Jets, 1 p.m.

Remember back in April when everyone and their mother lined up to praise Carl Peterson over how great the Chiefs did in the draft? Well, six months later, Peterson's Chiefs are a joke that can't stop the run or the pass and can't play offense. But hey, that sure was some draft! The Pick: New York Jets 23, Kansas City 3

Atlanta at Philadelphia, 1 p.m.

Believe it or not, Matt Ryan, Michael Turner and Roddy White make up the best 1-2-3 combo in the entire NFC. Alas, they'll be slowed down by a rested and hungry Eagles team on Sunday. The Pick: Philadelphia 30, Atlanta 17

Cincinnati at Houston, 4:15 p.m.

These Texans -- not the version we saw start the season 0-4 -- are the ones I picked to make the playoffs back in August. You hear me, Angrees4X? Got that, BuddhaPalm? I'm back on board this bandwagon, and there's still room if you guys want on. The Pick: Houston 44, Cincinnati 17

Cleveland at Jacksonville, 4:15 p.m.

This year's breakout special-teams star? Jacksonville's rookie undrafted free agent out of Stillman, Brian Witherspoon. If he suits up (he's nursing a sore thigh), look for the NFL's third-ranked kick returner to take one back against the Browns in a win on Sunday. The Pick: Jacksonville 24, Cleveland 20

New York Giants at Pittsburgh, 4:15 p.m.

Big Ben goes up against Eli in a battle between Super Bowl champions and fellow 2004 first-round picks. Another intriguing subplot? This is Plaxico Burress's first game vs. the Steelers since he left the club as a free agent in 2005. The Pick: New York 20, Pittsburgh 16

Seattle at San Francisco, 4:15 p.m.

One team's completely banged up and depleted. The other just fired its head coach on Monday. Flip a coin, pick the other one, and pencil the Cardinals into the playoffs this season. The Pick: Seattle 13, San Francisco 12

Indianapolis at Tennessee, Monday

Until the Titans beat the Colts head-to-head, not everyone will be convinced they're the class of the AFC South. Well, with the Indy rush defense imitating a thin sheet of paper, look for Tennessee to run all over the place in a surprisingly easy and convincing victory. The Pick: Tennessee 33, Indianapolis 16

Three Questions Heading into the Weekend

Is there anyone in Green Bay who still wishes Brett Favre was their team's quarterback?

When did the kid from "Two and a Half Men" get so old and tall?

When does Sarah Palin go on "Mad TV"?

Author:Fox Sports
Author's Website:http://www.foxsports.com
Added: October 23, 2008

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