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News » Schein's 9: Rookies who must produce early


Schein's 9: Rookies who must produce early


Schein's 9: Rookies who must produce early
Brett Favre'S on-again, off-again dalliance with retirement has him on the verge of joining the Minnesota Vikings. A secret meeting is rumored between both parties.


But we in the Twitter universe know nothing is secret. We've intercepted (OK, created) Favre's transmissions to Minnesota and beyond:

Favre4hire: "I hereby remain retired "... from mentoring Aaron Rodgers in Green Bay, from leading the Jets' 2008 choke job. Now I'll retire from unemployment."

VikesCoach: "Brett, this is Brad Childress, coach of your Minnesota Vikings. We can't get in trouble for tampering this time, right?"

Favre4hire: "Trouble? Trouble is being the only quarterback who lost to both the Raiders and 49ers last year. I ain't going out like that."

BarryZito: "Green leaves fall from white trees under blue skies."

Favre4hire: "Huh?"

YoAdrianP: "Adrian Peterson, here. Just promise I'll run the ball every once in a while. Fantasy owners are counting on me."

RaiderAl: "Fantasy Football is garbage. Also, don't listen to people who say you're trashing your legacy. I don't even know what that means."

Favre4hire: "Thanks, Mr. Davis. How 'bout a rematch of the 1976 season's Super Bowl, Raiders vs. Vikings?"

Real_Singletary: "This is Mike Singletary, coach of your 49ers . Come join the competition with Shaun and Alex. Around here, we always need a quarterback."

Favre4hire: "Sorry, the 49ers play the Packers only once this year. I can double that winning pleasure in Minnesota."

Matthew$tafford: "Stay out of the NFC North. This is my division now that I'm the Detroit Lions quarterback."

JayCuddler: "Stay out of the NFC North. This is my division now that I'm the Chicago Bears quarterback."

AaronNotFavre: "Stay out of the NFC North. I had to wait forever for you to leave. I've filled your shoes in Green Bay."

Favre4hire: "No one will ever fill my shoes. Or my Wrangler jeans."

Real_FiremanJoe: "J-E-T-S! Jets! Jets! Jets!"

Favre4hire: "Keep it down, Joe. Let's not remind everyone how I quarterbacked the Jets to a 1-4 finish after an 8-3 start."

ArmDoc: "I really need to speak with you, Brett."

Favre4hire: "Arm is doing great. Can still throw better than half these overpaid babies playing my position."

NFLDback: "No argument here, Brett. You throw an easy pass to catch."

VinceLombardi: "What the (heck) is going on out here!"

33765-183: "Michael Vick here in prison. Where else would I be? If you don't take that Minnesota job, I will. Or any other."

Favre4hire: "The more I retire (and unretire), the more I'll keep the headlines off you, Mike. Root4Favre."

HRking: "It's me, Barry Bonds. I keep saying I haven't retired, but nobody will hire me. You keep saying you're retired, but you keep getting a new team. Damn."

MaddenCruiser: "Brett, this is John. Why didn't you tell me you were coming back? I just retired from NBC."

VikesCoach: "Childress here again. Look at our schedule, Brett: First four games are a snap the Browns, Lions, 49ers and (drum roll, please) Packers!"

Favre4hire: "That sounds enticing. I'll go think about it on a bike ride. Lance Armstrong is waiting outside for me. He wants to talk about comebacks."

Contact Cam Inman at cinman@bayareanewsgroup.com



Author:Fox Sports
Author's Website:http://www.foxsports.com
Added: May 7, 2009

Dan Campbell Name: Dan Campbell
#89
Position: TE
Age: 32
Experience: 9 years
College: Texas A&M
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